Friday, September 05, 2008
and seriously, my precious writing is out of place~~ something wrong with the format or the blog skin! haha.. i need ur help corrine! lols.. well anyways....
I am happy after talking to someone today! she's my very close friend in secondary sch and jc, though not close during jc times.. I should say hostile, which to think back, feel regretful.
she's very special to me, because she had been there for me when I have little friends and become the outcast in my class.. not because i am weird or i have horrible classmates.. is just that my classmates dont agree my doings for ponning school very frequently.. and with little intereactions with them, i am quite alone with my studies.. and she's another one who loves to skip sch with me, and since then, we became very close friends.. we talked about everything.. we go tuition together, we study together, we have stay overs..
we head to the same jc, and the next class. supposed to be very close and fortunate to have her with me in jc.. but somehow, we became hostile... probably i had my grp of friends in jc, she had hers. I had my opinion that's not her way of doing.. and i regret for being narrow-minded, not accepting her as my friend.. and friendship could be so superficial and fragile, that it's too fast to be realised.
i feel sorry, sorry to have let go such a true friend.. and after 2 yrs.. i initiate to talk to her.. though things are not the same anymore, the closeness is gone, but honestly, the familiar feeling is back..
it's fate that allow me to have known her, regretfully not treasured, I would thank her for being my friend, someone so true to me!
ohhhhh.. sounds so childish and mushy~~ haha. pardon me!
12:24 AM
Thursday, September 04, 2008
Was thinking about myself today.. something considered meaningful lols..
I realised that I have changed.... for better or worst i cant judge. but i am no longer the chungying who seemed to speak whatever that cross her mind.. i've realised that i am very conscious and paranoid.. and i am afraid.. i am afraid that i distrust ppl.. i am afraid i detach myself from ppl.. i am afraid that i will not attach myself emotionally to anyone, even my close ones, because i've learnt one thing: to protect myself and not to let anyone to hurt me.
i asked myself.. am I over doing this? and in the end, i might hurt ppl around me, and set a barrier that was nv there, and make this a psychological baggage with much self induced pain.. is there really such a need to wear this nonchalant mask? the mask to cover the scar?
and i thought about it again and againnn.. and i dun wanna be another him.. i dun wan to hurt people who love me.. i dun wanna wear a mask.. i dun wan to be untrue to myself. I just need to be aware of things, observe and trust what i see, not what i hear.. i need to start to learn how to love and be loved (not being desperate here, love to be very general haha) and of course, be cheerful and happy.
emo today~~
8:41 PM
Wednesday, September 03, 2008
I have an expanded stomach coz i've been eating alot alot alot more food recently! hahaha!!
my daily routine ---- i will have breakfast with my mummy and den walk around for an hr or so to the wet market. go home rest a while and have lunch. rest a while more and wait for dinner. watch tv at night............ and that's for the day!LOLS seems very primary sch composition writing!! hahaha. coz of the english and the simple things that i do! heh.. well, this is a good way to relax before i get to start sch and work hard! =)
so now i am in a very relaxed mode while blogging~~
i wonder how busy are you guys out there...
i feel for you, i feel with you... so pls be happy!! =pp dedicate to my special someone =))))))
1:31 PM
booooo~~
michele asked me to write anything on my blog for her to read! anything anything anything anything anything anything anythinganything anything anythinganything anything anythinganythinganythinganythinganythinganythinganythinganythinganythinganythinganything anythinganythinganythinganythinganything.
haha! bleahx just being very irritating and stupid as usual!
to update, I have changed my interest!! in fact i realised that I hate to fix puzzle after trying to fix it.. hahaha. i rather slp, eat, do nothing den to touch the puzzle! oh noo.. so sad, the puzzle has lost its value, and of course, I WASTED MY MONEY! lolss
well, schools gonna start pretty sooonn~~ another 15 days? wow! after relaxing for 3 months, gonna gear up and start sch =) happpy somehow.. =p
and dunno why.. sometimes i feel relieved and happyy.. seems like a bird release from a cage, flew to somewhere full of danger and traps, and luckily escaped to a peaceful garden and think ' what doesnt kill me will just make me stronger!' and indeed =)
and elder sis went back to U.S ytd~~ after 3 weeks of holidays! hahaha. this 3 weeks was shop shop shop.. till dun wanna shop PLS! lolss.. once a yr, very reasonable!
sis and me!
1:37 AM
chungying's back to blog! =)
updates:
`Back from singapore, in HK now
`new found interest--> swimming and badminton
`time sparing hobby--> fixing puzzle, and indeed, takes lots of time and patience!
`shopping, as always =)
`play mahjong with my mum's friends( once in a while =p)
well, more or less my daily routine, and this is relaxing, absolutely not boring! hahaha!
something i thought was very true all of a sudden. It's stupidity that leads to disaster, which causes a state of desperation and finally, WISDOM.. blessing in diguise isnt it? chungying says it is! =)
you told me the truth, though not something i want to accept, this reality has made me grown up. and u know wad?! u made me feel strong and protected once again! =) thanks dearies!
ku shin bo! jap buffet at suntec with my besties in sec sch! =xx
corrrrrrrrrrrineee!!!!!! =) =) 8 yrs of friendship muackssssss~
mich, my pretty babe, with chungying the BAPE!! HAHAHA
1105 meet up! =)
oh, the nicest hang out place in malaysia! haa. though have no idea wad's the name of the place =p
can u feel love oozing out from my family photo??! =)=)=)
me! and my most loved mummy!!
yea! can u smile as happy as me? even darlie mr toothpaste cant! hehe
to let other's mistakes to make u feel miserable is unfair and unworthy. might as well be happy and make others feel the joy u have! so, dont worry, be happy!
1:28 AM
hello!
going malaysia tmr~ excited for the tropical malaysia trip! haaha. would be absolute fun lols!
ytd went out with many friends and shopped for the whole day! SO shuang to shop shop shop shop and shop! haa. sounds so bimbotic =p
actually, i cant think now, too hungry to use my brains~ heh
another thing I want, to be happy miss sunshine! yea.. hooooray bimbo CY!
12:22 PM
heyhey~
good morning everyone! woke up at 6 plus for breakfast with michele and promised her to pack my stuff, but fell asleep again! tired la. haha. so she came back from swimming and scream at me! WTEVA~ lols
yesterday night was so moody and burst into tears suddenly.. haha. and michele got so scared and coldnt concentrate on her driving, and in the end, i was more scared den her~ so, i stop my emo-ness, for the good of our precious lives. hahaha
and before i slept yesterday, I realised one thing, I shouldnt be upset so easily, I shouldnt make people around me feel awkward feel unhappy with me, and most of all, it should be a happy time to spend with my friends, why so spoil spot?!
疼我的人比不疼我的人比起来，令我更珍惜我的拥有。
chungying is going shopping soooooooooon~~~ yea! have a nice day!
10:52 AM
yEa!
after a few days of eating, i mean overeating haha, I got some indigestion problem.. lols. feel bloated and feel like vomiting. argh. but luckily i took some medication..but still I am going to eat as usual! nothing can stop me from eating! WAHAHA
So, just now went JUMBO to eat great food, chilli crab, shark's fin soup, and seafooooood~~ with mich's family =) yummy~~ though not too full =p after a hour, mich drove to upp. thomson road and we went to prata house to eat PRATA and milo dinosaur.. ohh. fattening fattening supper, haha. nvm. will exercise on monday, no worries...
ohhhhhhh relaxing carefree holidays, I am really enjoying you!! =) =)
11:40 PM
